***** WARNING *****
IF YOU ARE READING THIS, CONGRATULATIONS!
THE RELIQUERY: SAPIENT RESOURCES DEPARTMENT HAS DEEMED YOUR TINYMIND CAPABLE OF PROCESSING THIS NEW INFORMATION!
HOWEVER, IF YOU ARE INSTEAD SEEING A BUZZFEED ARTICLE ABOUT “THE HOTTEST CELEBRITIES FROM THE 1990S” YOUR TINYMIND IS NOT READY. IN WHICH CASE PLEASE DISREGARD THIS WARNING.
(BUT ENJOY THE SECTION ABOUT GILLIAN ANDERSON)
THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION REVEALS COSMIC TRUTHS BEHIND THE NATURE OF EXISTENCE, THE MEANING OF “LIFE”, AND WHAT LIES BEYOND DEATH.
IF YOU EXPERIENCE MEMORIES OF PREVIOUS LIVES WHILE READING THIS PAGE, PLEASE CONTACT THE RELIQUERY: SAPIENT RESOURCES DEPARTMENT, IMMEDIATELY.
THANK YOU - HAVE AN ADEQUATE DAY.
- THE RELIQUERY: SAPIENT RESOURCES DEPARTMENT
WHAT IS
THE RELIQUERY?
Perhaps frustratingly, The Reliquery is many things. And to make matters even more confusing, it exists in many places as well. It exists everywhere, and nowhere all at once. It is omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. It lies beyond your understanding of time, and space.
To understand what The Reliquery is there are…
6 THINGS TO KNOW:
1.
YOU
ARE A PERSON.
While the quality of said person is not part of this particular discussion and veers wildly philosophical, the fact that you are, regardless of what your friends and co-workers say about you behind your back, are a person. That is an irrefutable fact.
2.
THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE BESIDES YOU.
Another irrefutable fact is that there are other people, many of whom might be near you right now. Many of whom may look very similar to you, and many who may look quite different. This is neither by design, nor accident, it simply is. There are many different kinds of people, and none of them are more important than anyone else. However. this particular delusion persists, unabated.
3.
EACH PERSON HAS AN ENTIRE UNIVERSE WITHIN THEM.
Yet another irrefutable fact is that within each person (regardless of their proximity to you) exists an entire Universe… a Universe of thoughts, dreams, imagination, paranoia, hopes, and fears. And the sum total of a Person’s life, afterlife, and imagination, is contained within the Universe they create for themselves. Some universes are quite small, and some are quite large. Sometimes, universes collide into one another, and sometimes, they stay resolutely, determinedly separated.
4.
EVERYONE ELSES UNIVERSE IS JUST AS VALID AS YOURS.
Still one more truly amazing and equally irrefutable fact that is often misconstrued as “theoretical pseudo-scientific nonsense”, is that all of these Universes are, in fact, real. They are just as real as the Universe you are (likely) experiencing right now. All created by all of the aforementioned ‘other people’. All of whom are creative universes at an exponential rate.
5. EVERY UNIVERSE
IS FILLED WITH ARTIFACTS.
Artifacts are precisely why The Reliquery exists. Artifacts are magical, or technological items created within a universe that have unchecked, ill-defined, or are overpowered. Items that would be “game-breaking” on a cosmic level. Items that, if they fell into the wrong hands, could destroy worlds, entire universes, or worse… These artifacts are often created as part of fictional works, such as The Rings of Power, or Aladdin’s Lamp (both previously reclaimed by RRT-6155). Other items may seem more mundane, like “The Watch of On-Time” a watch that allows the wearer to arrive wherever they need to be precisely on-time (reclaimed by RRT-6665). While it may seem innocuous, given the right (or wrong) mind, any artifact can be used to terrible effect. It is our mission at The Reliquery, to Reclaim these artifacts so that they cannot fall into the wrong hands and be used to hurt others.
6.
ALL UNIVERSES
ARE PART OF THE OMNIVERSE.
Perhaps, however, the coup-de-gras of amazing, irrefutable, and most unrealized facts, is that every single Universe that has ever been created, real or imaginary, great or small, perfect, or broken, all coexist in something called…
By nature of what it is, there is only ONE Omniverse, and that is because The Omniverse consists of every single Universe, real or imagined, in history, antiquity, triviality, or obscurity, all together. All of it. Everything.
7. THE RELIQUERY
EXISTS IN EVERY SINGLE UNIVERSE.
Only one organization knows the proper methods to trip The Omniverse, and we do so on a treasure-hunt of the most epic proportions.
We are The Reliquery. We exist outside of space and time, our ceaseless mission is to find the most dangerous, and powerful artifacts ever created within an ever-expanding Omniverse.
